Skip to main content

I Hate Winter.


So now is about the time every year when I just get SICK of this crappy weather. I am totally a summer girl; I love being warm more than anything, and I am addicted to sunshine....but I can deal with the cold for a couple of months. After that, though, I just start getting stir crazy or something...or I have that Seasonal Affective Disorder!? Like yesterday, I just felt depressed all day! And for me, that is very rare-I'm always happy and in a good mood. But I think I just need some SUN, and I would feel all better!! Thankfully, today was much warmer(still not warm enough for me) and sunny, so I got to feel the sun on my face for a little while...it was great. : )

This is when I really start wishing that I lived in Florida. I've been wanting to live in Florida for years now, but my husband and I thought we would live here for a few more years and then move there. Recently, we thought that we were possibly going to have to move down to Tampa for my husband's job...but we're still unsure about that....we have our house up for sale, but it will probably take a while to sell it with the way the market is now. We've been thinking of just moving down there even if we don't have to...houses are really cheap now so it'd be a good time to buy-I've already found one I really like! Sometimes I really think I just want to pack up and move down there as soon as we can,but then again, I'm torn, because I start thinking about leaving my family...I would feel bad leaving my little brother here and my sister....I feel like I need to be here for them.

Well, last night I had a dream about this ex boyfriend of mine-I have dreams about him a LOT. It's like he still haunts me after all these years....He was my longest relationship before I met my husband, and I guess my first true love....I guess you never forget your first love! Plus, me and him never really had any "closure"-it kind of ended abrubtly because he moved away. Maybe that's why I still have dreams about him. It took me years to get over him. Pretty much until I met Matt. I compared every guy to him, and thought I'd never find someone better! But I did! I found someone much much much better, and I am sooo thankful. My husband really is my soulmate. He is everything to me! He's the one I waited for and prayed everynight for! And God answered my prayers-he sent me a good, Christian guy, who's HOT, and funny, and outgoing, and athletic-everything I wanted in a guy and more! He makes me happy. : )

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

People always said That time would heal the pain But how can that be When mine still remains? The tears still fall At just the thought of you So I know that what they say Just can't be true As the years go by I miss you so much still  No matter how much time passes I know I always will How are you not here To ease my hurting heart? Never could I have imagined We would ever be apart My world has been shattered A piece of me is gone And all I can do is pray For strength to live on I know that one day soon I will see you again I just have to try to suffer through And make it until then
5 comments
Read more

Putting My Heart Out There

Hey guys. Here's where we're at right now: Matt finished his radiation treatments last week. Did they help? I don't know. He's sleeping a lot more. Having trouble chewing and swallowing. Not eating much. Not talking much, at least not in full sentences. It's just been a slow, steady decline for the last few months. I think it was really too late for radiation....But who knows, maybe it is delaying things. We went in last Tuesday for his infusion and talked with his neuro-oncologist about everything that we've been seeing with Matt, and he decided that we're at the point now where we should discontinue treatments...I feel like it's the right decision, even though it breaks my heart knowing that there is nothing else we can do. But I feel like we've done everything. All the supplements, the diet, the chemo, the radiation... Matt has fought hard. He never gave up hope. He kept the faith. He never complained through any of this. Not once did I hea...
238 comments
Read more

Why?

Why? Why do I care so much?  Why do I make sure they brush their teeth at night so that they don't get cavities? Why do I spend my own money to buy them clothes, toys and decorate their rooms, among other things?  Why do I do 5,000 loads of laundry a week to make sure they have clothes to wear to school? Why do I make sure they go to church on Sundays so that they'll be raised to know about Jesus? Why do I try to give them chores and responsibilities so that they will turn out to be decent human beings? Why do I read them a bedtime story at night, even when I'm exhausted? Why do I clean up after them constantly and cook for them and try to always have healthy snacks and food on hand? Why do I go to their sports games and practices, just to feel like the odd man out standing there awkwardly with their bio mom? Why do I give 100% of myself and make so many sacrifices for children I didn't birth? Only to be insulted and told hurtful things? To be made to feel like I'm ...
5 comments
Read more