It's been a rough week. I feel like I have failed miserably and have let my stress and emotions get the best of me, and I have put more pressure on Matt when he already has so much to deal with. I'm not gonna lie, this is hard sometimes. Cancer is hard. The stress and worry can take it's toll on you.
Matt and I are alike in the fact that we've both always been the strong ones, the ones who everyone turns to for help and advice. He's always been the one to look out for others. So I think he feels like he has to be strong for me, and for everyone else. It's hard for both of us to admit when we don't have it all together or that we need help sometimes.
Yes, we have a strong faith in God that gives us an inner peace and joy that nothing can ever take from us....but that doesn't mean every day is all sunshine and rainbows. We're not always strong. Not every day is great. There are days of frustration. There is stress and anxiety. There are tears.
But by God's grace, most days are good. He is the reason we don't despair, the reason we have hope, the reason we can keep going. When we aren't strong enough, that's when we have to lean on Him. When we are weak, He is strong. He carries us when we can't walk anymore.
If anything, this has taught me how weak I truly am. This has taught me just how much I CAN'T rely on my own strength and how much I desperately need God.
There will always be ups and downs, good days, and bad days. This is just been a few bad days, but we will get through it. God never changes, God's presence never leaves us, and His grace is always there in unending supply, just when we need it most.
Matt and I are alike in the fact that we've both always been the strong ones, the ones who everyone turns to for help and advice. He's always been the one to look out for others. So I think he feels like he has to be strong for me, and for everyone else. It's hard for both of us to admit when we don't have it all together or that we need help sometimes.
Yes, we have a strong faith in God that gives us an inner peace and joy that nothing can ever take from us....but that doesn't mean every day is all sunshine and rainbows. We're not always strong. Not every day is great. There are days of frustration. There is stress and anxiety. There are tears.
But by God's grace, most days are good. He is the reason we don't despair, the reason we have hope, the reason we can keep going. When we aren't strong enough, that's when we have to lean on Him. When we are weak, He is strong. He carries us when we can't walk anymore.
If anything, this has taught me how weak I truly am. This has taught me just how much I CAN'T rely on my own strength and how much I desperately need God.
There will always be ups and downs, good days, and bad days. This is just been a few bad days, but we will get through it. God never changes, God's presence never leaves us, and His grace is always there in unending supply, just when we need it most.
You are not a failure. You are human! Cancer IS hard. And it's hard to be the caregiver because you just want your loved one to be better, and happy, and healthy. Let people help you...trust me, they want to! They will love it and you will feel so much more uplifted and rejuvenated! Praying for you!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much!
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