Lindsay's Ramblings

2020 is finally over! I had a blast going out for the first time ever on New Year's Eve. I love my friends! I'm not one to wish time away, but this is the first time in a few years that I've actually looked forward to a new year. The past 3 years of my life have been such a whirlwind and a roller coaster of emotions. My concept of time has been so distorted and has made the last few years seem like a whole lifetime ago. From finding out Matt's brain cancer had returned in 2017, to becoming his caretaker, to him passing away in 2018...to 2019 being such a strange year of grieving, dating, trying new things, starting a new job, learning how to live on my own first the first time in my life...my brain has been traumatized and is still processing and adjusting to this new life that still sometimes doesn't seem like my own. For so long, I felt like I was lost at sea, just drifting around wherever the waves took me. I had lost all my sense of stability and certainty when ...