Don't Be Bitter, Be Better

"Don’t allow your wounds to transform you into someone you are not." -Paulo Coelho

Sometimes I feel bitterness and resentment and anger build up in me from things that have happened in the last few years...people who have hurt me, insulted me, abandoned me....

And while I don't want to be naive or walked on or disrespected, I also don't want to be a person full of bitterness and anger. I don't want to be defensive all the time, or someone who gets easily triggered and reactive.

I want to be calm and gentle, while also having boundaries, which is a hard balance. I want to be grace-filled and slow to speak and not let my emotions get the best of me.

So I have to fight it.

I have to pray for God to take it from my heart when I feel the bitterness creep up. I have to pray for healing.

I have to let go of certain things.

I have to forgive.

Because I don't want it to make me into a person that I'm not.

I have to remember that at the end of the day we're all humans who make mistakes and let others down and say things we regret...I have to pray for eyes to see the people that have hurt me as children of God who deserve grace, just like I do.

It's definitely not easy, but it is something that I'm truly working on.

"I have found it is impossible to be unforgiving toward those I am praying for. It’s not easy to start praying for them; it’s one of the hardest things I’ve done. But when I make that person an object of prayer, I open the door of my heart a little wider so that God can come in and breathe on my hardened heart, melting the icy resentment that is there."

-Anne Peterson

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