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Just Rambling!

I cannot sleep lately!! I hate it! I have gone through these phases in the past, so I'm hoping it's just a temporary thing. Like, I will feel so tired at night to where I can't keep my eyes open after reading for a while, but then I lay in bed and all of a sudden I'm wide awake, my mind is racing, my heart is beating fast-what is up with that? The other day I was wide awake at like 2:30 in the morning. And I am definitely not someone who can function on low sleep. I need my 8 hours!

So I've tracked my eating for a few days, which I like to do only every now and then to check up on where I'm at and make sure I'm taking in enough. And I see that I'm still on the low end for where I want to be with carbs, even after adding some things in. Honestly, I love how I look and feel right now, so I am NOT going to get into macro obsessing. That gives me too much anxiety. I could care less if I hit certain percentages, but I do want my calories to be a tad higher. I know that I have some low days and some higher days, but to maintain my weight I'm usually between 2000 and 2500 calories a day. I know I gotta be consistent, but I am not actively trying to put on a lot of weight right now(I know, shocking!) When I look at old pics from a couple of years ago, I definitely can tell I have more muscle now! With that being said, I wouldn't mind an extra pound or two, all in the lower body preferably. ;)

I've been thinking lately about doing another powerlifting meet, and as of now... I don't see myself doing another one. I know, I know, as much as I LOVED the experience, the training, and lifting heavy, I know I'm not ever going to be competitive, and I can't justify spending hundreds of dollars competing just for fun! It was a great one time experience, something I can check off my bucket list, but I just don't see myself continuing to pay the hundreds of dollars it takes for a trainer, the hotel and for the meet itself.

I've been lifting for over 15 years because I freaking LOVE it.  I do it because it's fun and because I like being healthy and strong. And you know what? As much as I love following a plan, I also sometimes just like doing my own thing and not having to follow a structured plan. The main thing for me right now, is I want to just enjoy how I train and not worry about being on the "perfect" program to increase my strength. Sometimes you need to not think so much and just LIFT.

This is an excellent post by Nia Shanks that basically explains exactly where I'm at right now.
http://www.niashanks.com/darkside-performance/

"At its core intuitive strength training is about learning how to listen to your body so you can reap the most from your workouts; you’ll learn to take advantage of the awesome days, but you’ll also learn to back off when your body is saying, “I just don’t have it today”. Being able to adopt this approach is very beneficial because it allows you to realize that you’re not going to improve your performance every workout while encouraging you to take advantage of the days you feel great. As a result, you won’t be focused on your performance with every single workout but will be able to see a larger picture – the importance of gradual, consistent improvement, of course, but over weeks and months and not necessarily every single day."
Plus, there are just too many fun things I like to do in my training to limit myself to just training for powerlifting. Some days I just wanna be a "bodybuilder" and get a good pump and work on building muscle. Some days I wanna challenge myself with gymnastics or CrossFit movements just because I CAN. That's not to say that I won't go through phases where my focus is just on building strength in the big lifts, or that I won't ever follow a powerlifting program, but I don't need a platform to hit prs or a crowd to motivate me. I don't have anything to prove to anyone but myself. And I know what I can do, I FEEL strong, and I love my workouts! What more could you ask for?

Comments

  1. As for the sleep, I've experienced similar periods. For me it was about stress, and I'm guessing the same goes for you. Maybe it's the tracking of your food and re-thinking of workouts that's getting you worked up? Try some mindfullness exercises before falling asleep (the body scan exercise is my personal favorite!) Hope this helps! And also, thank you for such a wonderful blog!

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    Replies
    1. Actually it started about a week ago when I wasn't tracking, and I have no stress! I think it's just that time of the month for me, and some months are worse than others. :/ But thank you, I really appreciate the tips! I actually got a full nights sleep last night, and it was wonderful! So hopefully that phase is over.

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    2. Hope it stays that way! :) Just like you said, some periods are just like that, for no particular reason

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    3. Thank you! Those few days were no fun!

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  2. I recently hired a Trainer. Ive been working out over 15 years now but something just wasn't clicking. Ive been eating too low and she immediately put on more Calories, more protein. Im struggling with it, the mental aspect mostly. That more food = more fat on my body. BUT Im going to Trust the Process and give it 100%.
    I often think, When I reach the body I want will I be able to keep it? Will I be able to continue the process? Then I think of you Lindsay, and I see how you live life but still are able to keep a CRAZY fit body..and I see that it IS possible..that sometimes you do sacrifice for a goal but in the end you can be flexible and still get and KEEP your goal. Thanks Girl! You Rock..

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    Replies
    1. Yes, I know how hard it can be to add more food and to accept that you may gain some fat at first. But it's worth it to help build muscle and have a healthy metabolism! You're right, just gotta trust the process. You will totally be able to get to where you want to be and maintain it!
      Thank you so much!

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