Lindsay's Ramblings

I've been working with Matt's friend, Katrina, for the last few weeks on something we're really excited about, and I wanted to share it here. Both of us wanted to do something in honor of Matt's birthday, November 12th, so we came up with the Capp Kindness Project. The concept is to perform at least one act of kindness for someone on November 12. That's it! Matt was happiest when he could help someone or put a smile on someone's face, so there would be no better way to honor him than by helping others on that day. We've come up with a list of 34 specific ideas that you can choose from(34 for Matt's football number): We also ask that you would print out a slip and leave it or hand it out with whatever act of kindness you choose to do. The goal of this day is to spread kindness and love and also to share Matt's story. We would love for this to be interactive, so please join the event page on Facebook , and take a photo or post what you did ...

Just need to vent tonight. This blog is turning into "Dear Diary" posts again,  like when I first started it. Is that okay with y'all? Can I use this as a place to vent for a while? I feel like eventually y'all are just gonna get tired of hearing me say the same things over and over again...but it helps me. I just got back from Kalamazoo Michigan. A few of Matt's football teammates flew me out there for the homecoming game, where they did a little tribute thing for Matt before the game. I really enjoyed being there and seeing where he played. But every time there's a high, the crash always follows. The emotions all hit me later. That's just what things are like these days. You keep the emotions at bay as long as you can, and then they just hit you, and you come home and crash, and let it all out. Lay on your bedroom floor and sob. Just goes to show, don't let someone's "Facebook life" fool you. Behind the happy pictures they post, you ...

I had a hard weekend. The weather was finally beautiful, but when I got off of work Saturday, I got into my car and burst into tears. That's actually usually the norm on Saturdays. They're just hard for me. It's those beautiful fall days that are the saddest days for me, because it's the time of year we'd be cruising in the Jeep, or going someplace to eat outside. And now I'm doing all these things without him. And it just makes me sad, is all.  I did have a few okay weeks, but now I'm feeling one of those grief waves hitting me again... Yeah, I'm surviving. I'm putting one foot in front of the other and continuing to live my life. I have happy moments, and I even have good days.  That's when you  see the pictures of me smiling. You see me living my life and having fun. That's when you think I'm doing fine.  But what you see is what I let you see.  What you don’t see is me when I get to my car and finally let the tears fall. What ...